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Monday, April 26, 2004

Programming Humor

  • "The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names to constants; instead of
    referring to pi as 3.141592653589793 at every appearance, the variable PI can be given
    that value with a DATA statement and used instead of the longer form of the constant.
    This also simplifies modifying the program, should the value of pi change."
    - FORTRAN manual for Xerox computers
  • "Programming graphics in X is like finding sqrt(pi) using Roman numerals."
    - Henry Spencer
  • Real programmers are surprised when the odometers in their cars don't turn from 99,999 to A0000.
  • Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.
  • COBOL programmers understand why women hate periods.
  • Computer interfaces and user interfaces are as different as night and 1.
  • If God had intended humans to program, we would be born with serial I/O ports.
  • There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.

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